Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize