scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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