Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
