It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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