it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Help. Why am I so naked?
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