PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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