so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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