Jerry, you need to find god
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
