He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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