Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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