sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Randomize
