Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
