Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I have aggressive nipples.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
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