so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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