so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
