he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
