Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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