'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
