I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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