whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
