I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
it was like eating out sand paper
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
