And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
