Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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