guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
not ubering you a puppy
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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