This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize