if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize