Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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