I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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