Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
