I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
