Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
