Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
