My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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