dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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