Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
