Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
