There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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