You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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