i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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