pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
