i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He shit in the fireplace
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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