I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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