Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She told me I should be a condom model.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
