wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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