Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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