need another drink. this is the easiest way
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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