i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
