ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
