You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
This is the high leading the old right now
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize