just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
