i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
